So, everyone now-a-days has a blog. I read several blogs every morning as part of daily routine, but I’ve recently decided its time to start writing again and what better place to start than with my old blog—with a post commenting on what my life used to be.
HORRIBLE. That’s horrible with all caps, baby!
Now-a-days, things are a bit less dramatic and a bit more boring. “Holy freakin’ Moly” is all I said as I read the last two entries on my blog. I was a hot mess and I’ve come a long way my friends. I finally kicked my son’s father to the curb, reclaimed my life and my mojo. I did therapy to rebuild my self-steam, trained for my first season of triathlons and finished three, ahem, you don’t have to hold your applause anymore.
I got into the best shape of my life, felt great again, and then, BAM–out of no where I meet the perfect man for me. He’s not perfect, far from it, but he’s perfect for me. What amazes me is that out of this deep dark hole I buried myself in, I scratched and clawed my way out of it one day at a time.
I was desperate for a new life. A happy life. I wanted to feel like me again and embrace everything I loved doing and appreciating before I allowed that bad man to break me. It included traveling, reading, hiking, movies, dinners, paper crafts, making things with my hands, photographing life’s moments and beautiful peaceful places. Not to mention, I also wanted to develop friendships again and reconnect with people on a personal level. I had abandoned all my friends and as a single mom, didn’t know other mothers to confide in. So, I worked on myself for over a year and I blossomed into an amazingly strong woman. I had found myself and would never let anyone take that away from me again.
So, meeting my new guy, was a bit scary for me as you can imagine. I was terrified I’d date the same men I had in the past. I was afraid of trusting and giving again because I didn’t want to lose myself. What is really an eye-opening experience is that I realized for the first time in my adult life, I didn’t need a man to be happy. And my new guy knew this. I had so many wonderful things going on in my life, he was grateful to be a part of it and instead of stealing my sunshine, he gave me and my son more of it. He loves me as I am and more importantly loves my son as his own. I was more cautious than he was and at times, skeptical. He gave me his heart on a silver platter and for that, I will always be grateful.
So things are good. Really good. There is no more drama, fights, anger, resentment, sadness, emotional and verbal abuse. I travel all the time with my camera in tow. I have dinners with several gal pals. I build things when I can (my backyard looks great). My best friend is also a single mama with two wonderful boys and I have an AMAZING support system in my professional and personal lives.
I watch movies with my new guy who is obesessed with them too. He doesn’t like to read books, but tells me every morning he loves me when he wakes up and also before he goes to bed at night–so I can’t really hold the reading thing against him.
So here’s to a new take on life and being able to appreciate it once again…